A mother. A daughter. A topic.
Topic: Undergarments (+ Giveaway!)
{ Giveaway from Yummie Tummie. Details below. }
Cindy Thinks
Ally Thinks
Until recently (I swear!) I had no idea there was such a plethora of undergarments available to women.
And now that I know, I am SOLD!
And quite frankly…I don’t know how I lived without them for so many years! You can literally transform your body in any number of ways using hundreds of new body shaping garments. I swear there’s one for every conceivable shaping need or want for your body.
You can lift, separate or push together your breasts using strapped, strapless, wired, no wire, padded, unpadded, plunging, high profiled, lacy or plain bras.
You can push up your tush, flatten it, round it out, or add to it. You can flatten your tummy, cinch in your waist, and slim your thighs. And…you can do only one of these things at a time, use different combinations at the same time, or pick one of those handy dandy multi-shaping garments that focus on specific “target” areas to provide you with an All Over shaped body.
Or so I thought.
Recently, we had a Bar Mitzvah to attend and several women in the family (well…really just me, one of my cousins, and, at times, a reluctant Ally) were consumed by discussions of which undergarments were available and would be PERFECT for each of our outfits. We spent hours on the phone, texting or emailing different styles, brands and configurations of undergarments as we each shopped and explored what was available to meet our needs.
Clearly…we had way too much time on our hands.
I planned to wear a lovely black dress with a shocking pink liner (from my closet – woohoo!) that had a form fitting bodice (that’s body shaping terminology for “upper body”) which required (in order for it to fit me properly) something that would cinch in my waist and hold in my tummy.
BUT…I also needed something to push up these ever lowering breasts (NO…they are NOT drooping yet thank you very much!) so they would peak over the fabric to give a hint of cleavage (realizing that this look would be acceptable for both the synagogue and the after party).
THEN…I wanted to lift and smooth my tush so that the fabric of the dress would lay seamlessly in that area, while slimming my thighs and still allowing the dress to swirl effortlessly on the dance floor.
SO… I decided to look for one of those multi-area shaping garments that target different areas of your body to meet all of my body shaping needs in one fell swoop.
No problem…until I went shopping.
Apparently, the undergarment makers of the world like to focus on two, MAYBE three “target” areas on the body at one time…but usually not six.
No such luck.
But, being the resourceful person that I am, I came up with the amazing idea to COMBINE undergarments to cover all of my needs. I mean, is that brilliant or what?
So I went looking for bra to lift me up, a corset-like thing to cinch in my waist, and a full (really full) panty to lift up and smooth out my tush, hold in my tummy and slim down my thighs.
I am pleased to report I found all three!
But when I put them all on together…I couldn’t move. And I looked like I was wearing Body Armor. And, bending was a complete impossibility. And, breathing was more than difficult. And…here comes the deal breaker…dancing would have been totally out of the question.
So I took them all off and started to negotiate with myself. It was clear that I couldn’t wear all 3 pieces at the same time, so I decided I had to pick the most important parts to shape for the event.
OMG! Which parts are more important for a dressy event? The tummy? The tight cinched-in waist? The peaking cleavage? The raised and smooth tush? Slim thighs?
I ask you…can being a woman be any more challenging??
I ended up finding two items that successfully achieved some significant body shaping in 4 out of the 6 areas (no, I’m not telling which ones). And I was happy…enough. But I wasn’t comfortable. But that didn’t bother me because according to the rules my mother laid out for me when I was young and impressionable: dressing for an event is not supposed to be about comfort. So I didn’t expect to be comfortable.
But that’s just wrong. Why shouldn’t we be both beautiful AND comfortable!?!
Well…I’m happy to tell you that now we can be both.
After the Bar Mitzvah, Ally introduced me to an undergarment (by Yummie Tummie) that she found awhile ago that she loved! Then they sent me one! It hits at least 5 of my target areas (no I’m not telling you which one it doesn’t touch) and is pretty damn comfortable and pretty.
I practically live in it.
FINALLY!!!!
*Note: Let’s be clear. Part of my enthusiasm in finding the perfect body shaper is that I really thought I could get that perfect looking body without doing a damn thing on my own to make it happen. I mean seriously…why else would I go through all the trouble to bolster my body in all that armor? Answer: so I could get the look without doing any of the work! And…I don’t think I’m alone here…but we all know it doesn’t really work that way. Damn it.
I’m not going to talk about regular old bras and panties. Yes, they’re necessary, sometimes they’re fun to shop for, and sometimes they’re incredibly annoying. Instead, I’m talking about the kind of undergarments that promise that you’ll look 10 pounds thinner by wearing them.
You know how they promise that? They suck you in and don’t let go. Sure, you can’t sit down or take a deep breath, and your ribs are probably permanently bruised, but damn it, you look good.
Recently, I needed one of these magic pieces of clothing to wear underneath a little black cocktail dress. I ventured to a department store and grabbed half a dozen different types of “shapewear”. Some were slips the length of the dress, some were just bottoms, others were corset style tops.
I took a deep breath (because it’s physically necessary), and started with one of the corsets. You’re supposed to step into these things, and then shimmy them up into place. Did you notice I said “supposed to”? Can you guess why you’re supposed to do the step and shimmy?
I do.
It’s because if you try and put the things over your head, you’ll end up like me, standing in a department store dressing room, with half of my head sticking out through the top, my arms pinned together at the elbows, my wrists flopping around in front of my face. And you, like me, will think of a variety of options that you then have.
The initial panic that set in told me to just rip the damn thing in half. I could either swallow my pride and bring it to the cashier and pay for it, or throw my clothes back on, brush my hair in front of my face, throw the stupid thing in a ball on the floor and run for it.
I didn’t appreciate either of those options, so I thought about an alternative. I could call for help. I can’t have been the first person to get stuck in one of those things. In fact, something like the following should be on the job application for any store with these types of undergarments:
“A sales associate in this department must have excellent customer service skills, superior organizational skills, and be willing to help customers who find themselves immobilized by our merchandise, with little damage to the product or patron.”
Thankfully, I didn’t have to do that. Instead, I was able to claw my way out of the damn thing with no damage to the devil piece of clothing and minimal damage to me. I had a pretty sizable bruise on my left arm, and almost popped my shoulder out of its socket in the process, but overall, I survived.
I ended up buying something, but hated the way it squeezed me so hard that my internal organs were in danger of rupturing.
And then I went BlogHer 2010, and an awesome party called Socialluxe, where I met the crew from Yummie Tummie. The founder, Heather Thomson, was there, telling us all about her company. She said that her products are different because they work without being uncomfortable. Sure, I thought, I don’t believe that for one second. But, when they offered to send me one of their products for free, I jumped on the offer.
(Of course.)
When one of their employees asked if I wanted a tank top or a pair of briefs, I asked which would be better for my little black dress. “Oh! This is what you need,” she said as she handed me a beautiful little undergarment that was a top and bottom together. She said she’d get it to me in a few weeks. Later, when I reached out to them on Twitter saying that my dress needed to be worn sooner than I thought, they sent it overnight to me.
LOVE THEM.
The Teddie is beautiful, it smooths everything out, but it never feels like body armor. It made me look hot, and it gave me a much needed confidence boost (which, really, is why I forced myself into the other items in the first place). Since I received the Teddie, I’ve bought the Original Tank for myself, and wear it all the time. It’s great to layer with, and my internal organs don’t feel like they’re shifting when I wear it.
AND, all of their clothes come with a little tag telling you how to put it on, so I have yet to get stuck.
Win.
Now, my wish list for the holidays is full of Yummie Tummie products.
And Now For Something Special:
We each received a Teddie from the wonderful people at Yummie Tummie for free. We didn’t want to leave you all out, so those same wonderful people at Yummie Tummie are allowing us to do our first giveaway!
One lucky reader will randomly be chosen to win a gift from Yummie Tummie. The winner will have a choice of one of the following fantastic products:
The Teddie
The Slippie
The Briefie
The Shortie
To enter, all you have to do is Suggest a Topic using this form. Anyone can enter, and we’ll choose a winner next Monday. Please send us as many topics as you have, but your name will only be entered into the giveaway once. The winner will be announced next week and contacted via email.
A note for our male readers: feel free to enter this giveaway! If you win, you can give the prize to whomever you want. HOWEVER, we feel we have an obligation to warn you that you shouldn’t randomly give a woman shapewear unless she's explicitly asked for it. (Read this post we wrote in August for some more insight into why that's probably a bad idea.) Might we suggest sending her a link to this blog and letting her enter herself? It’s really up to you, though.
Good luck, and thank you to Yummie Tummie for being awesome!
