She Thinks

I almost bailed on this topic as I was really struggling to come up with any bad habits.

(Cause I’m just such a wonderful person.)

Or…I can’t keep focused long enough to think about any bad stuff about myself.

So I asked Ally.

I left her a voicemail saying that I was having a really hard time and needed her to tell me what bad habits I had.  (I figured they’d just roll off her tongue!)

Apparently, my message must have come off as somewhat needy with a high pitched voice, because she texted me back:

“Just got your message…be sure to add whining to the list.”

So I whine.  But only when I don’t get what I want…when I want it.

And I guess that’s a bad habit.

I also leave the TV on for the dogs when I’m not home.

I don’t really expect them to watch it, but somehow I feel like the noise of human voices coming out of the box on the wall will provide comfort to them in my absence.

But I know it doesn’t.  They could care less.  It just makes me feel better about leaving them.

And I know it’s a really bad habit because it totally wastes energy.

But I don’t stop.  I left it on for them tonight when I went out for dinner …as I was adding it to my list of bad habits.

And I waste water too.

I take really long showers and I leave the water running in the sink when I brush my teeth.

I know it’s wrong and wasteful, but I just let that water run and run and run (and please note… I am very clean).

And finally…

I use an enormous amount of tissues in any given day.

I wad them up in my pants, stuff them in my shirt cuffs (YES…like an 80 year old woman), shove a dozen or so loose tissues into my purse, and stash tons of them in every coat pocket in my closet.

The actual possession of tissues is not by itself a bad habit…no…it’s the mixture of the used and unused pieces that causes me to sift through them all seeking the most unused one…that I’d say is the bad part of the habit.

But I don’t stop.

I’m a waster.  And a mixer.

And now I have a whole new group of pet peeves (about me this time) that I can’t stand.

I should be shot.

I don’t make Resolutions anymore.

I used to. I used to make them in earnest and work really hard at following through on them, but I always peetered out after about, oh like 10 days, and would then feel like an utter failure.

So I stopped.

Because I HATE to fail.

And it was a stupid thing to do to myself.

But I DO like to set goals and accomplish things, so now I wait about 10 days until the resolution hubbub dies down and then I figure out what I want to accomplish for the foreseeable future, and set out to do those things.

But they’re NOT resolutions.

They’re just things I put on the calendar to get done (or get to do).

I’m ALL ABOUT putting things on the calendar.

I’ve come to understand that unless I make a date (plan, commitment, pledge – whatever you want to call it) to do something, the days and weeks and months will pass by aimlessly, and I’ll find that I forgot (avoided, procrastinated) to do whatever I thought I wanted to do.

So I get it on the calendar.

Somehow, if it’s on the calendar, I feel like I have to follow through with it.

Not on the calendar…I don’t go.  But if I put it on the calendar that I’m going to the gym on Tuesday and Thursday of this week…at 9:00 a.m., then I do it.

“Go camping”

When for God’s sake?  On July 14th – cool…we’re goin camping!!!

“Lose 10 pounds”

Really?  By when?…by March 12th – cool…I have 10 weeks to do it, and I swear I can lose that damned 10 pounds (even though I might spend the next 10 weeks gaining it right back).

I guess I’m just organized (anal compulsive).

Or…I have severe memory loss and can’t remember what I want to do unless it’s written down for me in an organized manner…on a daily basis.

So, even though it’s not past the 10 day mark yet…and resolutions are still hot in the air, I have a few things on the calendar for the month.

• Go to the gym (Mondays, Wednesday, Fridays @ 9:30) for the next 4 weeks.
• Lose that damn 5 pounds I just put on over the last 4 weeks (going to the gym 3 days a week should get that done!).
• Resume my dance lessons with Matthew on Tuesday nights.

Whew.

I feel like I’m getting stuff done already!

And since it’s on the calendar (I really put it all on the calendar as I was writing this)…then I know I’ll follow through.

I SWORE out loud – to myself, that I would NOT put off writing this week’s post to the last minute.  I mean come on…you can see what the topic is.  I made a pact with myself when Ally and I agreed to write on Procrastination at the beginning of the week, that I would not (absolutely not) fall into the trap of putting this task off until the last minute.  As I usually do.  Every week.

It is now Sunday afternoon…and I have 4 hours before Ally will send me her reminder text that my post is due.  So I’m still HOURS ahead of the game!

I’m such a procrastinator.  I know I do it, and it bugs me to do it.  But I can’t help it.

I blame my father.

He was the “King” of procrastination and I think he must have genetically passed it on to me.

At first glance, you’d never know that he was a procrastinator because he would write extensive lists detailing out all the tasks he had to accomplish every week.  He would write out each task in bold large printed letters – all in neat and numbered rows on a yellow legal pad, and label his list “Things to Do” at the top of the page.

And then he would move onto whatever else he could possibly spend his time doing…OTHER than those things on the list.

It’s not that he was lazy.  On the contrary, he was extremely successful and busy all the time.  He just seemed to have an absolute aversion to doing things he knew he had to do…until the very last minute.

Which I think is the definition of someone who procrastinates.  It’s not that we don’t get stuff done, it’s just that we want to do it on our own damn timeline!!

In this regard, I am my dad.

I too make lists.  I too title them “Things to Do.”  And I too have a long history of putting things off until the last minute.

But unlike my dad, I like crossing things off my list…a lot.

So I’ve learned to use my desire (no…obsession) to cross things off my list as a way to balance my genetic tendency to procrastinate.

And I do it by playing a sick little game with myself.

Every week I write my list of Things to Do, and each day I go about my business of getting stuff done.  At the end of the week I go back to my list to see if I just happen to have completed anything I had written down.  If so…VOILA!…it gets crossed off the list and I am thrilled.

If not, (here’s the sick part)…I add the stuff I did do, just so I can cross it off!

Case in Point.

This week’s list.

Here’s how it went…

Things To Do:

1.     Write my blog post on Procrastination

2.     Clean out the basement closet

3.     Reorganize all of the Xmas decorations from the past 25 years

4.     Figure out all of the furnishings for the house I’m building (all 8 rooms)

5.     Clean the backyard and prep for fall/winter

6.     Take all 4 dogs to the vet for required shots

Things I actually did:

1.     Fed the dogs – twice a day…each day!

2.     Folded all of my laundry…from last week.

3.     Shredded paperwork from the box titled Important papers 2006

4.     Made my bed – each morning.

5.     Made chicken salad.

Now my list looks like this:

1.     Write my blog post on Procrastination

2.     Clean out the basement closet

3.     Reorganize all of the Xmas decorations from the past 25 years

4.     Figure out all of the furnishings for the house I’m building (all 8 rooms)

5.     Clean the backyard and prep for fall/winter

6.     Take all 4 dogs to the vet for required shots

7. Fed the dogs – twice a day…each day!

8. Folded all of my laundry…from last week.

9. Shredded paperwork from the box titled – Important papers 2006

10. Made my bed – each morning.

11. Made chicken salad.

It’s now almost 1:00 on Sunday afternoon and I’m done writing this post…3 whole hours ahead of schedule!   And now, I get to cross #1 off my list!

I’m thrilled.

And I’m thrilled to be my father’s daughter.