She Thinks

I thrive on Change.

I initiate it.

I get bored without it and then if things get too quiet, I initiate it some more.

I guess that makes me a change junkie.

But…I also like routine.  A small amount of routine to balance out all of the changes I create in my life.  Like when the dogs get fed each day;  or the way I like to have a cup of coffee in bed every morning before getting up, but then have to be fully dressed with make-up and jewelry on and bed made, before going back downstairs to start my day.

You know…the OCD kind of routine stuff.

I’m not a maniac or anything.  I’m just a weird kind of change junkie who also happens to like having things orderly around me.

And everything needs to move quickly.

I like my changes to happen fast.

(Clearly, that whole patience thing is not my strong suit)

I think it has to do with the fact that my hair grows really really fast.

I never worry about getting my hair cut (apparently some women absolutely flip out over the idea of cutting their hair!).  But my hair grows freakishly fast.  So when I get bored with my hair style (which happens every few months or so) and decide I need to get a new haircut (as soon as possible) – I just do it.  And if it ends up not being something that I like (which is rare because I have an amazing hair stylist)…I don’t freak out because I know it won’t take more than a few days (ok…maybe a couple of  weeks) before it grows back to where it started, and then I’ll get to change it again.

So I started to try to figure out if someone was a “change agent” or “change adverse” by figuring out if their hair grew quickly or not.  Typically I found that people with fast growing hair would accept and/or initiate change much better than someone whose hair took forever to grow back.

So I labeled it the “Speedy Hair Growth Theory.”

It totally makes sense.  If someone with slow growing hair gets a bad haircut, they’re totally traumatized because they know they’ll have to live with the results of that bad haircut forever…so they extrapolate that feeling into everything else and they become afraid of change!!

It’s brilliant.

Maybe my Speedy Hair Growth Theory is also the reason why I make decisions quickly.

Really quickly.  And most of the time it’s a good thing.  Once in awhile…I can jump a bit too quickly.

But that’s probably why I also get shit done.

You kind of have to like change, and be able to make decisions, in order to get shit done.

And that’s why I liked running my business.  It was in a constant state of change that required a million decisions as our services changed, our people changed, our operational models changed and our level of quality and expertise grew and evolved.

And I knew…if we didn’t change, we wouldn’t grow.  But we did grow.  And the business evolved into an amazing and successful company.  And then it sold.  And I was lucky enough to get the chance to change my life again, starting a whole new chapter in my life.

Initiating more changes as I go…and feeding my change junkie habit.

In order to answer this question I found myself walking around my house looking at all of the “stuff” I own and asking myself if I thought one thing or another  was the most important.

I knocked lots of things off the list right away.  Electronics, clothes, shoes (come on…I like ‘em but I’m not that shallow!), furniture, bake ware….ya know, all the stuff that sits in and on cabinets and closets throughout the house.

And then I thought about my artwork.

The oil painting hanging over the couch in my office was my first piece of art worth more than $100 and I do love it.  It’s a beautifully done oil painting of flowers in an exquisite frame.  It is the most beautiful painting I own.   But truthfully, it’s not even close to being the most important thing I own.

In addition to the painting, I now have 3 amazingly beautiful sculptures that Brian has given me since we separated (I know…don’t even get me started) that I certainly would make a point to grab and put in my car if I was told that I had 15 minutes to gather my possessions before my house were to blow up.  But again…when it comes down to it, they aren’t the most important items I own.

So then I thought of all of the sentimental stuff I have.

Obviously, the first thing I thought of was our family photos.  After Brian and I split up, I was the one who declared that I would be the keeper of the family photo albums (of which there are probably 20-25) and I have them neatly stacked on top of each other on storage shelves in the basement.  Not that I don’t love to look through them, and cherish all of the pictures/history/memories in them…but the reality is that they “live” in the basement.  So in all honesty, how can I proclaim them the most important items, when they gather dust in the bowels of my house 99.9% of the time?

Jewelry?  I do now have some amazingly beautiful and sentimental pieces, and I would be absolutely heart sick if I ever lost them…(like a necklace that was my mom’s and another from Ally, a watch from my grandmother, earrings from Brian and a bracelet from Matthew) but I just can’t elevate any one of them to the status of “most” important thing that I own.

So how about books?  There are a few (not many as I’m not a voracious reader like the other members of my family) that have shaped my life.  They influenced the way I look at the world.  They occupied hours of my life by taking me to places and times I’ll never visit.  They broadened my mind.  But they certainly are not the most important things in my life.

So what the hell could it be?

It’s my dogs.

We could get into a philosophical argument as to whether or not our pets are our property or chattel?  But the reality is…that they (there are 4 of them now) are the most important “things” in my life.

I don’t treat them like things.  I treat them like pets.  That I love.  And cherish.  And care for.

And when it all comes down to it…if my house were on fire, the ONLY thing I would run in to rescue without thinking about it twice…would be my dogs.  The rest…while important to one degree or another…are just not the most important things in my life.

We’re on vacation together, which means we’re probably coming up with some great material for future posts!

Have a great Spring Break!